Grief and Loss Counseling
Has A Traumatic Loss Changed The Way You Live?
Are you struggling with the sudden loss of a spouse, a parent, or a child, wondering if you can ever feel happy or whole again? Has their passing left you numb or indifferent to relationships and pleasures you once enjoyed? Have you lost someone to suicide or addiction and want to reconcile longing for their presence with the anger, resentment, or unfounded self-blame you feel?
Perhaps you have witnessed a loved one slowly succumb to an illness. But now that they are gone, you feel as though you aren’t mourning them enough or in the right way. On the other hand, it could be that you’ve suffered a devastating perinatal loss and are having trouble processing—or even understanding—your grief as you mourn a human being you never had a chance to know.
Losing a loved one—or even the loss of a pet, a career, a home, or a lifestyle—can have a profound and lasting impact on a person. This is especially true of children who are highly impressionable and more vulnerable to trauma than adults. Moreover, parents who are grieving are often unable to see their child’s suffering because of their own. Helping kids (and yourself) learn how to deal with grief is crucial and sets the groundwork for how they can best manage and process loss in a healthy way throughout their lives.
Unfortunately, though, grieving isn’t exactly a linear process. Oftentimes, it can be an emotional roller coaster that knocks you back and forth. But with our compassionate guidance and support, you can get to the other side of grief and begin living again with renewed hope, confidence, and purpose.
Signs of grief
Crying is a well-accepted and well-recognized sign of grief.
Questioning the purpose of life and your beliefs
Feelings of detachment or numbness
Feeling worry, anxiety and/or guilt
Feeling frustration and/or anger
Changes in sleep habits
Changes in behavior including self-isolation
Changes in eating habits
Physical symptoms (e.g. pain, fatigue, headaches)
Increased levels of stress
Grief And Loss Are Natural, Although Difficult, Parts Of Life
As ridiculous as it sounds, the only way human beings could ever avoid feeling grief is to never love in the first place. But love, like grief, is an inevitable part of life. When we love someone—or something—so dearly, their loss and absence creates a ripple effect throughout every part of our being. And despite how natural and common loss is, knowing this does nothing to lessen its impact. We still end up feeling lost, alone, and often misunderstood.
Of course, loss doesn’t necessarily have to be centered around the death of a loved one. Oftentimes, a divorce, difficult life transition, medical diagnosis, or loss of a job can be so demoralizing that it makes us question our identity, purpose, and future. Loss also exposes us to the fragility of the human condition and the sometimes ruthless nature of life. In the process, it challenges our sense of safety, security, and stability, making the world look much more dangerous. The resulting fear and uncertainty can turn into a fertile breeding ground for anxiety and depression, especially in children.
At Thrive Postpartum Couples and Families, we understand that everyone responds to loss in their own way. But if you’re stuck in a constant state of mourning that gets in the way of your relationships and interrupts your daily routine, we encourage you to reach out. With the help of a caring and understanding mental health counselor, you can learn to process your grief, assess your life objectively, and honor your loss while moving forward in peace.
“Where there is grief, there was love.”
Grief Counseling Can Offer You Profound Healing
Therapy provides you with a warm, compassionate space where you can let go and share your story with someone who can provide you with unbiased support. We can help you process all the different aspects of your loss while developing strategies for functioning on a daily basis as you heal. In time, you can gain control over emotional triggers, such as anniversaries or birthdays, and learn to cope with your loss in a way that promotes greater healing and peace.
Because losing a loved one or enduring a difficult life transition can be so destabilizing, we’ll first help you find a way to begin functioning again on a daily basis. We will start by taking a look at your loss, the challenges you are facing, and how you are handling the grief, now. Then, we’ll explore your personal history of grief and loss, searching for links or factors that may complicate the grieving process. Through gentle reflection and honest dialogue, we can help you move through the sorrow and longing rather than circumvent it.
Grief is not a pathology or illness to be diagnosed—it’s a natural process that only the most fortunate of us never have to go through. Therefore, therapy isn’t about fixing or curing you—it’s about helping you work through the pain and getting your life back on track. And although there is no right or wrong way to grieve, using our person-centered approach to healing, you will be able to better understand, validate, and process the intense, complicated emotions you may be feeling.
One of the tools we use is EMDR Therapy, a powerful and rapid way of treating the most extreme symptoms of individual and family trauma. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is another effective model that enables you to make make subtle shifts in your thoughts and behaviors that alter the way grief and loss affect you. And art and play therapy are valuable tools for accessing children who may be non-verbal or reluctant to talk about their loss. Most importantly, we want to empower you to allow yourself the right to grieve, especially if you are feeling pressured to “get over it.”
We understand that it may be difficult believing that something good can come out of this troubling time. But it is possible to incorporate loss and grief into your life in a way that creates meaning and enrichment. By working through your pain, you can feel less anxious, be more hopeful, and give yourself permission to eventually be happy again. In time, you can learn to resume your life and live at peace with yourself while still honoring the memory of your loved one.
Perhaps you are considering grief counseling but still have some questions or concerns…
Should I consider group counseling or individual therapy to work through my grief?
At Thrive Postpartum Couples & Family Therapy, we recognize the importance of individual therapy in the healing process and provide personalized sessions to support you on your grief journey.
Here are key reasons why individual therapy can be helpful:
Tailored Approach: Individual therapy focuses on your specific needs, challenges, and goals, providing customized support that addresses your unique circumstances.
Confidential and Safe Space: In individual therapy, you have a confidential and safe environment to express your thoughts, emotions, and concerns without judgment or comparison, promoting deeper vulnerability and exploration.
One-on-One Support: With a skilled therapist specializing in grief counseling, you receive undivided attention and guidance, benefiting from their expertise in navigating the complexities of grief.
Intensive Exploration: Individual therapy allows for in-depth exploration of your grief, including its roots, complicated emotions, and unresolved issues, facilitating structured processing and healing.
Focused Attention on Progress: Your therapist continuously assesses and adjusts the treatment plan based on your progress and needs, ensuring the most relevant and beneficial support throughout your grief journey.
Flexibility and Convenience: Individual therapy offers scheduling and session frequency flexibility, accommodating varying emotional needs. It can be conducted in-person or through online platforms, providing convenience and accessibility.
While support groups offer a sense of community and shared experiences, individual therapy provides personalized, confidential, and focused support, allowing for deep healing and growth as you navigate the complexities of grief.
Does asking for help mean that I am weak or broken?
Of course not. This is not about you being inadequate or weak; this is about being human and experiencing a devastating change in your life. Grieving is absolutely natural. But it can be extremely difficult for family and friends to empathize with and help a person overcome grief, especially when their loss involves a child or a pregnancy. Grief therapy gives you the opportunity to talk to someone who understands your pain and can identify your internal strengths, offer you tangible coping skills, and help you find your own source of resilience.
I’m worried that grief and loss counseling will only make me feel worse.
In the beginning, things may feel heavy. But you are giving yourself (or your child) the best chance to work through the pain so that repressed feelings, thoughts, and memories won’t keep you stuck or resurface at a later time. Some people are reluctant to open up for fear of being jarred emotionally. But our job is to make you feel better, not worse. So we will always move at a pace that feels comfortable and safe for you.
I feel like I should be over this by now. Is there something else going on?
For some, the healing process can be hindered by underlying issues. For instance, a strained relationship with the deceased, a traumatic loss, or a personal history of loss all have the power to complicate or prolong grief. Whatever your concerns are, we can get to the root of them together. And while you may feel as though you should be over your loss by now, there is no set timetable for overcoming grief and loss. It’s a process you have to go through, and we’ll be there with you every step of the way.
Let Us Help You Find Peace
If you would like to honor and respect the memory of your loved one while resuming your life with confidence, we can help.