“Trauma is not the story of something that happened back then. It’s the current imprint of that pain, horror, and fear living inside people.”
—Bessel van der Kolk, MD, Medical Director, The Trauma Center in Boston
At some point in their lives, most people will experience a traumatic event that inevitably limits their capacity to feel safe, whole, and happy. However, many individuals have the misconception that trauma has to be the result of a tragedy, such as perinatal loss, combat experience, or a natural catastrophe. But the effects of trauma can manifest for many reasons.
Trauma can be “big” or “small”.
Abusive relationships, adverse childhood experiences, and extended exposure to a series of “small” traumas can have just as profound and harmful an impact as a sudden, tragic event. These “lesser” traumas could even include deviations from expectations for success and happiness. For instance, the often lofty goals and flawed preconceptions we have for birthing, parenting, relationships, and self-reliance sometimes clash with the illusion of control in our lives. When setbacks or loss causes those plans to fall through, the new reality can have a devastating effect.
The unresolved pain can have a deep and long-lasting impact.
Trauma ingrains painful memories so deeply that they distort the way we think, act, and feel—essentially constricting how we live our lives. Instead of being relegated to the past like most memories, trauma makes the experience a permanent fixture in the mind, a recurring telling of events that repeatedly brings the sensations, sounds, and imagery back into the present.
Trauma can have a severe impact on nearly every aspect of a person’s life. Relationships can suffer as communication problems, trust issues, and emotional volatility grow from the unresolved pain. It can impair your ability to take care of yourself or function on a daily basis. And the fear and uncertainty can force you to live in a box so narrow that it feels like your only option is to withdraw from everyone and everything. So you are forced to avoid situations, people, or even opportunities for future happiness to protect yourself.
Therapy can help you live with greater strength and peace.
At Thrive Postpartum, Couples and Family Therapy, we want to help you find hope, solutions and enduring strength that will enable you to move forward with your life with confidence and without limitation.
If you feel that a traumatic event(s) is holding you back or preventing you from exploring new possibilities for happiness, we can help. For your free consultation, please call 224 698 9792 or click here to schedule your first session online.